scobleism.

1927 Tour de France, credit unknown, but if any of you know the origin, do please let me know.

DNF

Three letters, in capitals stand for “Did Not Finish” have a profound effect on me

The idea of not completing a ride due to inane issue such as mechanical, health, or just severe weather bother me so much that I occasional feel horribly desolated, unable to face anyone even thought they have little concern about a simple “bike ride”, it’s the only thing I find myself from being out of control and were able to forget everything that’s happening and just concentrate on getting to the next controller.

I have to DNS (Did Not Start) The Dean 300k because of the severe weather warning of low temperature and heavy snow/rain, looking out of the window in London I kept telling myself I made the right choice but somehow I kept doubting it.

The next one is the 3Down 300k in a couple weeks time, I better have to make that one.

When it come to ascending the mountain on a bicycle, I’m not sure how to described it, all I can says it’s probably one of those age old male trait of getting it done, needing to complete it, an ego booster, or simply climbing for the sake of climbing, in fact I really don’t know why I liked doing it, perhaps it’s the pain cave? the achievement or lack thereof? or the challenge? 

Then I remember George Mallory’s comment when asked why he climbed Everest, and his respond is simply;

“Because it’s there”

I reckon that summed it up perfectly, simply because it’s there was enough reason for me to ride the passes, humanity has always been trying to reach out, to leap before you look, to take risk, having says that, it’s not exactly a risk climbing Hardknott, it was as 48 hours prior to arriving in Cumbria, Hardknott was impassible covered in snow and black ices, I knew this but pressed on out of sheer stupidly (or braveness they’re in all honestly the same, you can’t have just the one).

Bike Rules

I’m not a member of the “roadie” sub-culture, nor do I particularly wish to be (some of the rules are funny, some are sage, many are totally ridiculous), but it made me realize that I have formed my own set of rules after several years of cycling in London. Some of my own, some are adapted from the advice of others and some are stolen. Here are the ones that spring immediately to mind:

1. The daily commute is not a race. If I overtake you it’s not a challenge, it’s because I’m faster than you, so don’t feel compelled to start mashing your pedals furiously, wheezing and causing havoc in my general area. Likewise, if I’m riding slowly it’s because I’m enjoying the lazy pace or I’ve had a heavy one the night before. Looking over your shoulder with a shit eating grin as you “leave me for dust” just confirms that to me that your partner and ambitions are unfulfilled and you make up for it by pedaling furiously to a job you hate. The other possibility is that you’re an abject wanker.
2. The only vehicles that have any place on a pavement are children’s bikes and mobility scooters. If you’re riding a bicycle on the pavement and you’re older than twelve you should contemplate the series of unfortunate events that have led you to behave like a water-brained sociopath and might even consider seeking professional help.
3. It is good to have a slow friendly bike with paniers and a bell to keep you from taking the business of cycling too seriously. The bell should be loud, clear and desperately cheerful so people are inclined to hop out of your path with a smile and a wave. However, when you are taking the sleek and speedy road bike, fixed gear or single speed (none of which should have a bell) this all changes. As zombie commuters step blindly into your path without warning, a short and sharp – but inoffensive – vocal command should be issued to remind them that not everyone inhabits a vacuously swirling world of Starbucks muffins and smart phones filled to bursting point with anodyne bullshit.
4. Hero worship is for spods and nonce-cakes. Fantasizing about licking Bradley Wiggins’ rippling calves is fine if that’s your thing, but don’t confuse those feelings with the joy of riding for the thrill of it.
5. It’s not shameful to wait in a queue of traffic if the only other option is ending up as a streak of tarmac jam. If you are unable to anticipate the likely outcome of coasting between busses or carving up criminally negligent nose-pickers in Porsche Cayennes then you should consider cycle training or trading in your bike for a Super-Deluxe Platinum Oyster card.
6. Everyone in or on a motorised vehicle is a fuckhead unless proven otherwise. So are most pedestrians and cyclists. However, those who drive, cycle or walk with care, skill and grace should be met with an appreciative smile and a nod. And a reacharound if you have the time.

NB. These rules were written on whiskey, as all rules should be.
As written by Lawrence Brown

The aforementioned tatto, healing up nicely now,  bit of scab but nothing to worry about.

My letter;

Dear Sir

I would like to complain about the road behaviour from one of your driver with a registration RV52 SFY this afternoon near Balham in London.

He appear to not give any consideration to anyone who’s also using the road, as I was cycling, he overtook me with little space to spare*, he drove onto my lane and I find myself having to swerve and brake at the same time to avoid getting caught under this particular HGV.

*(highway code 163: give motorcyclists, cyclists and horse riders at least as much room as you would when overtaking a car (see Rules 211-215)).

I think nothing of it, it’s possibly a poor judgemental on his part as we were approaching an island which forced him to make a poor choice of manoeuvre by accelerating and swerving in the nick of time avoiding the island, so I gave him the benefit of doubt.

The second time it happen, he also gave me so little space, I end up having to bang on the side of his door to get him to pay attention as I have no room to go again since the road has shorten ahead and forcing him to go on my lane, luckily he swerve and gave me room to escape.

As I was stopping at a traffic light, he decided to get out of his vehicle, walked toward me (3 cars away), and shouted at me right in my face, I could not tell you what he said at the time as I’m deaf and couldn’t understood him, I was naturally quite angry at the fact he didn’t realised how closed it he to causing manslaughter and shouted back as he walked back to his vehicle holding up the traffic.

I’m aware that the driver doesn’t represent your company, but with the manner he drive, I hope you’re now aware that his road behaviour could affect customer using your company, I am very sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but I’m sure you would want to hear about this ASAP rather than finding out that this particular driver cause injuries, even fatal to others on the road with the speed and manoeuvre he drive at.

Best Regards

Edward Scoble

Their respond;

Dear Mr Scoble,

I have just received a copy of your complaint regarding the behaviour of the driver of our vehicle RV52SFY.

Firstly,may I offer my sincere apologies both for the dangerous position you were placed in and by the consequent actions of the driver. This falls well below the standards we expect from drivers.

In this particular instance the driver was employed on a temporary basis for holiday cover.We have subsequently advised his agency of your complaint and instructed that he will no longer be permitted to drive a CCF vehicle.

Should you wish to discuss the matter further,please do not hesitate to call me on 0*********3.

Yours Sincerely

Dave Norton Branch Manager CCF Croydon